Dealing With Loss of Friends

[Mockingbird]

I was reading a post in another thread that I thought would be a good topic of discussion- sometimes when a person faces serious health issues they find that many of their friends just eventually go away. It makes you feel so alone and you start to wonder if they were really your friends at all. I think sometimes it is because they just don't know what to say or to, maybe they are afraid too. But is this an excuse? Share your story so we as a group can better understand this phenom

[leighdu]

Fortunately it hasn't happened to me (knock on wood) but I had a family member that went through something similar. Most of her friends just wanted her around for the life of the party, and slowly one by one they all kind of just disappeared. It made her a stronger person though, and she found a new set of friends that were more understanding and going through similar health problems.

[andrew25]

I had been blessed with a good family and friends that they had always stand by my side whenever there is an emergency. It all depends on how much quality of friends you make and not the quantity of friends you have.

[vlada]

I was reading a post in another thread that I thought would be a good topic of discussion- sometimes when a person faces serious health issues they find that many of their friends just eventually go away. It makes you feel so alone and you start to wonder if they were really your friends at all. I think sometimes it is because they just don't know what to say or to, maybe they are afraid too. But is this an excuse? Share your story so we as a group can better understand this phenom
Thank you very much for your post because it's very serious topic and I think that it is needed to be discussed. I'm sure that in the most cases people have been changing for the worse when they start to be ill. It's the main reason of the loss of friends. If you have enough power to control your selfishness then people will never leave you alone with your illness.

[Mockingbird]

If you have enough power to control your selfishness then people will never leave you alone with your illness.

I'm sorry vlada, I just don't see why you would assume anyone that is ill suddenly is selfish? Are you saying because they need an extra hand they become selfish? I am not certain what you meant to say but the sad fact is people do leave you alone when you are no longer able to do all the things you once did and I don't think it has anything to do with selfishness. You will always have family and those that love you, but it does become hard to make new friends with people who do not know how to accomodate people with disabilities.

[naturelover]

You generally started an opinion. But, we friends of longtime are so close and nothing comes in between. There was a situation when one of our friends dad was no more and all the last rituals has to be carried out. None of his relatives came forward to assist him and ultimately, we 5 friends all together done our best. There may be people who are only to show up for the money and never thought about human values.

[leighdu]

Thank you very much for your post because it's very serious topic and I think that it is needed to be discussed. I'm sure that in the most cases people have been changing for the worse when they start to be ill. It's the main reason of the loss of friends. If you have enough power to control your selfishness then people will never leave you alone with your illness.

I truly do not understand this post at all. Why would you think people become selfish when they are ill? And no, I disagree that people lose friends because they become "selfish" when they are ill. It is more like friends are used to friends being a certain, and their own ignorance drives them away when their ill friend can't do the things that they used to do or their ill friends take on a different perspective in life.